Secrets

disclaimer: this is an OVER EXAGGERATION

I made this because i felt some people could relate

I do not in fact have any serious secrets, but i do have my own little secrets, deep in my heart. i cant stand telling anyone, but that claws my throat, making me feel guilty, because i know, my friends tell me things like that, but i can't pull myself together. I have secrets that i'm dying to tell but at the same time can't. 

the worst thing is, my secrets are child's play, nothing to hide, little thoughts i have, something that is fine for my friends to know, but i can't and wont tell anyone. Even today, my friend asked a question of a similar topic. It was the perfect time to tell them the secret. but i lied. i'm sorry. Thats why I feel awful. Like a liar and hypocrite. I shouldn't doubt you because you don't doubt me. You deserve my trust.


Does that mean i have trust issues? i think so. I know i have to trust those dear to me, because they trusted me with the same, but i can't. I'm being secretive, so i am ashamed of not letting my friends know. I feel obligated to tell some of my friends, but i don't have the nerve to share whats going on in my head. My little secrets are just nothing, nothing to hide. nothing important. Something friends laugh about, talk about, think about normally. things friends share, or at least my friends do with me. 

if any of my close friends reads this, im sorry for doubting you all. i am just too secretive. I hope i get myself together.  You guys are awesome, and you share everything with me, and i kept that a secret. now, i feel i need to tell you mine. and i will. 

later.

in person.



i'm making a big deal out of nothing, but just because i feel guilt.